• Home  / 
  • success tips
  •  /  How Masculine Stereotypes Can Destroy Men | Tony Robbins Podcast

How Masculine Stereotypes Can Destroy Men | Tony Robbins Podcast


“Be a man.” “Man up.” “Start acting like a man.” These are things we hear all the time – in the locker room, in the media, in our own homes. We’ve been conditioned to adopt certain beliefs about what “masculinity” is, and we routinely force those ideals and expectations upon others, and upon ourselves. But what has this cost us?

In this episode, Tony’s editorial director, Ana Yoerg, sits down with entrepreneur, performance coach and host of a top-ranked podcast, Lewis Howes.

By all accounts, Lewis had always fit the cultural ideal of what a masculine man should be. He was a two-sport All-American who went on to play football professionally. He built his podcast, “The School of Greatness” into a global phenomenon. And he was becoming financially and professionally successful beyond his wildest dreams. But he soon realized that his whole identity was built on misguided beliefs about what “masculinity” was: dangerous, false ideas learned from teammates and coaches in locker rooms and stereotypes in the media. And like so many men, Lewis grew up to be angry, frustrated and always chasing something that was never enough.

So at 30 years old, Lewis began a personal journey to shed the many masks that he and so many other men wear, and to discover who he is at his core. He sought advice from some of the world’s best psychologists, doctors and household names like Tony Robbins himself. And he documented everything that he learned in his latest book – The Mask of Masculinity: How Men Can Embrace Vulnerability, Create Strong Relationships, and Live Their Fullest Lives.

In this episode, you will hear Lewis discuss the ultimate emptiness of the Material Mask and the man who chases wealth above all things. You will hear him talk about the cowering vulnerability that hides behind the Stoic Masks of men who never show real emotion; and the destructiveness of the Invincible and Aggressive Masks worn by men who take insane risks or can never back down from a fight. And you will learn about Lewis’s own struggles with the masks he has worn, and how he has learned how to break through the walls that held them back so he could truly find himself, and ultimately, how he could find true happiness.

Discover Date With Destiny – Tony Robbins’ most intimate event, where tens of thousands of people have committed to designing their most beautiful lives. Over six immersive days, you’ll explore the depths of what drives every behavior, thought, decision and emotion you experience – and you’ll learn how to take control of your life to feel more joy, freedom and love than ever before.

Visit Tony Robbins' websites:

Follow Tony Robbins @:

Tony Robbins is a #1 New York Times best-selling author, entrepreneur, and philanthropist. For more than 37 years, millions of people have enjoyed the warmth, humor and dynamic presentation of Mr. Robbins' corporate and personal development events. As the nation's #1 life and business strategist, he¹s called upon to consult and coach some of the world¹s finest athletes, entertainers, Fortune 500 CEOs, and even presidents of nations.

About the author

  • Chuck Smith says:

    First 🙂

  • Creating The Good Life says:

    Hello everyone!!!!

  • Kamal Soydari says:

    a nice vedio

  • b1rdkeeper S says:

    Life is about balance. Being stoic does not mean you keep your mouth shut while the world around you burns to the ground. Being an alpha male does not mean you beat your chest and pick fights with strangers, hit women over the head with a club and drag them to your cave, etc. Most alpha males I know are just confident in their own thick skin. Being intelligent, well read and confident of your intelligence, and self-aware enough to realize there is always more to learn does not make you a “know it all”. I think Lewis’s problems had/have more to do with narcissism than anything else. Stop obsessing over yourself and think about how you can improve the lives of other people WITHOUT screwing them over in the process. Easier said than done but if you live like that you can sleep well at night and smile when you look the mirror every morning. Lewis needs to learn humility.

  • The Crypto Lark says:


  • Dan B says:

    Tony “I work for the jews” Robbins

  • Practical Inspiration says:

    This seems to be a really common subject the last couple of days. I’m glad people are acknowledging between what’s productive and what’s destructive

  • theANSWER4MVP says:

    I’m not a fan of the topic, the male feminist movement. Of course childhood trauma needs to be adressed but this mask of masculinity theme allows to much for a victim mindset. Masculine, feminine, alpha, beta who cares about those labels …..do you, be you.

    • Men of High Value says:

      theANSWER4MVP yeah I agree. This thing that he explains doesn’t work in terms of attracting women, which is the entire reason why men act like they do.

      Emotional stability is key, and of course share your vulnerabilities and weaknesses with trustworthy others of the same gender, if needed.

  • Tired Tiger says:

    Being stoic or alpha or know it all doesn’t need to come with neither of those problems you quoted. Quite the opposite actually. One can wear a mask or actually be it. But I can’t explain all here so I have just a question regarding your example: that woman became a widow, right. But would it be better for their kids if she was dead? Or both maybe?

  • Alex Zubarev says:

    Who eIse is a true fan Of Tony? 😍 I’m gifting my next 50 subs! 👊Have a phenomenal day and rest of 2019!❤

  • Tired Tiger says:

    You nailed it on the example of the guy who has to always be put together. Everybody live for relationships, if frustrated in that, they die. And society put the partner as the main goal. So men will always live to please their women and vice-versa. So until women gets to a point of stability, men will have to provide it. And imo, and historically speaking, women were supposed to bring that stability instead, but the modern world is messing all up. Now women are supposed to be masculine and men be feminine. And that’s why everybody is unstable nowadays. Society is saying that our nature is wrong.

  • Men of High Value says:

    Man, I don’t trust Tony Robbins when it comes to relationships.

    And the things they talk about in this podcast makes it more confusing than less for guys.

    Just strive for emotional stability. That’s all.

  • Jono 84 says:

    The amount of abused males in the male feminist movement isn’t a surprise. How they can be so weak as to allow women to manipulate them, and use their pain against other men and thus to help feminism emasculate men is shameful.

    Him being traumatized by abuse has nothing to do with other men and how they live their lives. But somehow its become this way.

  • K Friesen says:

    I’m not gifting any subs.

  • Petra Lohmeier says:

    Thank you for sharing, it helps to understand what men may really need when they are showing an outward mask. The bit with masks also helps to understand why we women sometimes act the exact same way, especially those of us who have lived in a man’s world for a while and felt the need to fit in by developing a masculine mask, e.g. because overt femininity elicited aggression rather than connection.

  • James Monroe says:

    I’ll never attend a Tony Robbins training but I’ll still read his books and listen to most of the stuff he says. After this interview I’m going to be scanning his stuff to make sure it’s not tainted by this misrepresentation of masculinity.

    Did he know this was being released and with the title? I think someone might get fired for this. The only thing I can think of is that he’s been getting so much flak from the victimized mindset that is over represented in mainstream media, that he had to put this out there to cow tow to their demands.

    Reminds me of when pewdipie tried to donate $50k to a hate group to win their favor but his audience stopped that crap right in its tracks.

    Yeah come halloween all us men will take off our feminist mask and say we fooled you. You thought we bought into your transhumanist agenda but we are actually reclaiming our masculine attributes. Time to clean house and bring order to the gender dysfunction before its too late.

  • Curious soul says:

    His book came at the wrong time for readers who might think that their country leader went through similar childhood experience. But the history shows that the human genome is built for everyone according to their mapped life, and some men are just built to be aggressive and competitive and jerks and bullies and fighters, so the world moves forward faster because of such people. I am not in favor of such behavior, but I believe that there is a greater scheme of things where these people play their important role

  • Sky's The Limit says:

    Fan of tony but this video is toxic

  • Paul Jablonski says:

    The masculine aspect is the force that provides and protects ones family.
    If a person is not full of trauma, masculinity is an overwhelming force for good

  • >